Today my wallet was so full of cards I couldn't zip it closed anymore. SO I had to clean it out. One of the things that went was Genevive's health insurance cards. I have been carrying them in my wallet for two and a half years after her death.
It is odd the little things that we hold onto. I admit I went back and forth until reason told me, why in the world am I still carrying them around. So they now live safely in her memory boxes with everything else.
And now I feel sad, like another doorway is closed between her and I. She is gone, it is not like the cards are going to change that, but sometimes I am angry life goes on. Maybe I should have just left them alone.
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Thinking about Genevive today so I thought I would come post. Things are going great around here, the pregnancy is going well, but I still miss my baby. I think it could be the pregnancy, but I have been thinking about her a lot, and looking at her photos a lot. She was so awesome, It makes me angry that such terrible luck had to come by her. Lets go find some new photos to post, it's the 9th, so I will look for some 9 day old photos.
Day 9 was an awesome day. It was the only day I held both of my babies at the same time. It was also sibling day so Alexander came to see them as well. Genevive was sleepy most of the day.
Sucking her thumb during a diaper change.
All fresh and changed and back to sleep. I went back home for a while after this.
Can't leave this one out, though I have posted it before. Later in the evening.
Taking a rest with Mommy.
With big brother Alex.
Looking a little disappointed that we put her back in the isolette.
Big brother Alex checking her out, and singing ABCs to her.
at 8:23 AM