Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Happy Birthday Genevive
Yeah, I sprawled "Happy Birthday Genevive" on my bathtub wall with Lily's bath crayons. Seemed better than lighting a candle, I am sick of lighting candles.
Tomorrow is Lily and Genevive's second birthday. Can't believe it has been two years already. What a journey.
I am back in my misery and guilt. I can't feel happy, and I feel bad because I think I should be for Lillian. Instead I am such a mix of emotions I feel like a lunatic. Yesterday I told a newly grieving mother, "It gets better, I promise". And it does, it's better this year than it was last year...... but it still isn't easy.
Tomorrow should be a day of twos! Two little girls, turning two! Two little fancy dresses and two little cakes with two little candles each. But half of those twos are missing, and it is just very unfair.
I need to get my act together, Poor Lily can't have a lunatic for a mother on each birthday.
at 3:17 PM